Friday, September 14, 2007

Questions for Other Parents and Chores.

Jonathan will be home here in about 25 minutes, I decided that its OUR time today. I know we get alot of our time. Its just that we deserve this time today. If he has any homework, it will get done first and foremost. That way he has the entire weekend to play or whatever he wants to do outside of chores. I am seeking a little feedback on the chore issue. I would like to get some input on what you do with your kids/teens on what chores you assign them too. Like do you let them choose or do you tell them ok this is what you do this week and next week you trade, stuff like that. I would like to know what chores are appropriate for a 10 year old who has ADHD and has the selective hearing thing like his Father. I really would love to hear some feedback as it means so much to me to hear other peoples perspectives and how they handle it. I for one, want him to have some more structure and I know too from reading up on ADHD, that kids who have a structured home life tend to do better in school. So if you can either shoot me an email or leave a comment that would be wonderful.

9 comments:

Lori said...

My kids have done chores since they were 5. Small ones of course but still, they had to do something. I think it gives them a good work ethic and makes them more responsible.

As for the a kid with ADHD...I think it's no excuse but it does make it harder. A few years ago we had a little girl with ADHD and took several medications for it, anyways, she obviously had really not been disciplined much at all and sure didn't know what chores were (she was 8). In the 2 mths that we had her, she cleaned her own room, helped with the horses, and was taken off her medication. We would still give her a coke or coffee in the mornings though..that helped calm her down a bunch. The point is, despite the extra effort and the struggles along the way, we treated her like our other boys.

We have since learned she is doing very well in her new home and at school. She makes her bed and lays out her clothes. I'd like to think that we had a little bit to do with that:)

Lori said...

By the way, my son recently turned 11 and he hauls trash, feeds horses, cleans his room, and even washes 2 loads of clothes a week. I do the rest.
I know the ADHD is an issue but from experience, I think you need to treat them the same as you would with a child without it, which will take even more patience but it will be good for them in the long run:)

Jill said...

We have chore issues here too. With Kiddo, she has a really hard time doing anything unless I am standing over her directing her every single step. It's really hard to get her to do anything. I wanted one of her chores to be washing the dishes at least one day a week but she doesn't get them clean and she has issues with putting her hands in the "dirty" sink water. I desperately need to find things for her to do.

Sue said...

As I go through my day when I think of things to blog about I write them down and just today I wrote down allowance. When our boys were small we assigned them chores, made a chart with the chores on it for each kid, 3 boys. They were to check off the chore when they got it done, in turn for getting all their chores done in one week they received an allowance. $1 for each year old they were! I know it sounds like a lot but wait! The allowance was then divided in thirds. One third went into the "family tax" jar, one third went into their bank account and one third was theirs to keep. The family tax jar was used to save up for a family night out. Movies or dinner of their choice. Then my husband and I would thank them for taking us out. 2 of my three boys are now diligent savers. My oldest who's out on his own now, has 3 months worth of his bills saved for a "just incase" time. I don't know what happened with my middle kid! It just didn't take! LOL!

Sassy said...

I have three girls ages 12 1/2, 11 and 6. All three of them have chores. The oldest two have dishes and living room. They switch up. One week one does the dishes and the other does the living room. My 6 year old picks up the dirty clothes in the bathrooms and cleans her room. The younger two have ADHD and are on no medication. When my 11 year old was 5 she started behavioral therapy and with their help we learned how to break chores down for her to where her mind isn't racing. Hope this helps.

Lisa said...

Start small. I have my 3 year old help me put away her clothes. Granted she only does her underwear, socks, and PJs, but you have to start somewhere.

dragonfly183 said...

My kids do dishes, mop floors, clean kitchens, clean glass tables, help me clean up leaves and weeds help stack firewood and anything else i can think for them to do. The rule is if it isn't done correctly its done again and again until its done right. My son once spent an entire evening washing and rewashing dishes because there was grease and food left on them and he was to lazy to clean it off.

If they whine or complain about having to do "anything" I have told them to do they get more work than they had before. They learn to keep there mouth shut fast.

My son is also ADHD. You have to be firm with them. Don't stand over them to make them do it but do make them repeat it. For example if a spot is missed while vacuuming they don't just redo that spot, they redo the entire floor!

Michelle said...

I know this sounds alil insane but my son is 2 ands a half and we started having him he feed the dog and the cats, With our help of course but we want to start this early so its not so complicated when hes older. Well that and he actually Wanted to do it before I decided to even make it a chore.

He will also help take the dishes out of the dishwasher and hand them to me to put dishes away.

Silver Maple Leaf said...

I think its very wise to start them early. My kids are my step kids but since there mother dropped them off one weekend and never returned I'm pretty much the only mother they have. They were 5 and 3 at the time and discipline had been horribly neglected since there mother was to busy playing tramp in chat rooms. The weekend after they arrived Chris was in the floor watching cartoons and I asked him to go to his room and hang up the clothes I had jut put on his bed (he was 5) he said no. You don't say no to an adult where I come from! I spent 30 minutes chasing him around the house and carrying him kicking and screaming to his room and finally whipping his tale and threatening to take the TV away for a week before he finally did it.