I finally lost it.

Two weeks ago today, I lost everything in my basement. Today the city is here to pick up what was ruined. I went back there and apologized to the gentlemen because there were 4 of them throwing my stuff away. The moment I lost it was when they picked up a picture of my niece and just threw it away. My Heart is officially broken beyond repair right now. I don't know how much more I can take from dealing with all of this and how my Son is going to react seeing his stuff gone. In a way, I felt close to my ruined stuff with it in the back but now that its going to be taken to some landfill somewhere, where my memories are going to be buried along with the others that were affected it got me good today. Right at this very moment I have alot of bad feelings building up inside of me and I want my memories back. I would give anything to have them back. Anything....I have been praying everyday that a miracle would happen. But my heart is broken right now and I feel sooooo lost. Lost.